In medieval times, hand fasting represented the betrothal (or engagement to be married) of the intended couple, not the actual marriage itself.
In the late 18th Century a combination of rumour and romance led to the belief that hand fasting had historically been a trial marriage lasting a year and a day, but which had by then fallen out of use.
This myth became even more widely spread after Sir Walter Scott included a hand-fasting in his novel The Monastery (1820).
In the 1995 film Braveheart, Mel Gibson in the role of William Wallace was hand fasted to his love Murron.
More recently, hand fasting has become a popular addition to wedding and civil partnership ceremonies.
Below is an example of wording used during a hand fasting at a recent ceremony, but there are many other examples of hand fasting ceremonies on the internet.
A length of tartan, ribbon or cord can be used as the hand fasting cloth. The hand fasting cloth can either be tied by the registrar, or you can involve one or two guests in tying the cloth.
Before the couple make their vows to each other the registrar will say:
Ladies and gentlemen, [name 1] and [name 2] have chosen to be hand fasted as part of today's ceremony.
Hand fasting is a tradition that stretches back to ancient times, and is where we get the expression "tying the knot".
[name 1] and [name 2], please turn and face each other and join right hand to right hand and left hand to left hand.
Ladies and gentlemen, the joining of the hands in this way makes the symbol for infinity, and signifies [name 1] and [name 2]'s connection to each other, the circle of their ever lasting love.
Now I am going to ask [guest name] to bind the hand-fasting cloth.
[Guest name] turn the knot once for [name 1]'s love for [name 2].
Turn the knot once for [name 2]'s love for [name 1]
Turn the knot a third time for the love and good wishes of all those present.
And now tie the knot to bind one to the other.
As this knot is tied, so your lives become bound together, one to the other. The knot may be untied, but the future of your marriage/partnership always lies in your own hands.
After the couple have made their promises and declarations to each other and before the exchange of rings, the registrar will ask the couple to slip their hands out of the hand fasting cloth, leaving the knot intact.
'Jumping the broom' is a tradition in which the couple jump over a broom at the end of the ceremony.
The act symbolises a new beginning and a sweeping away of the past, and can also signify the joining of two families. The custom is historically associated with the Celts.
Registrar says
[Name] and [name] have chosen to conclude their ceremony with the tradition of jumping the broom.
Today we honour and celebrate their journey from two separate lives into one life united by love. We place a broom for jumping, which symbolizes the entrance of the couple into a new life together.
(At this point designated person-parent, family member best man or whomever you wish, places broom on ground in front of couple).
Registrar continues with
Sharing a life with another person requires many leaps of faith. The leap they take together over the broom is also symbolic. By taking the leap, they make a gesture of dedication to working together through the tough times ahead, as well as the easy times.
They leave behind the past and jump into the future together secure in their love.
Everyone please count 1, 2, 3 ... jump! Together with me now, as they perform their first act of working together as husband and wife;
1, 2, 3, jump!
Applause!
The couple jumps over the broom, and then kisses. Immediately, the music begins and the couple recesses down the aisle to the cheers of family and friends!
Couples may choose to light Unity Candles during their ceremony to represent their union.
An example of words used with Unity Candles are given below.
Many other examples can be found on the internet.
Candles can also be used to remember absent family or friends or to symbolise the joining together of two families.
At start of ceremony, Registrar says:
[name1] and [name2] have chosen to incorporate unity candles in today's ceremony.
Can I ask Guest1 and Guest2 to come forward to light the two outside candles.
[name1] and [name2], these are two distinct lights, each capable of going their separate ways and they represent your lives in this moment.
After declaring couple to be married/civil partners, Registrar says:
[name1] and [name2] can you please each take one of the separate candles.
As you each take a candle and together light the centre one, you will extinguish your own candles, thus letting the centre candle represent the union of your two lives into one shared future.
As you are now joined in marriage/partnership, there is a merging of these two lights into one light.
From now on your thoughts shall be for each other rather than your individual selves.
Your plans shall be mutual, your joys and sorrows shall be shared alike.
As this one light cannot be divided, neither shall your lives be divided but united as one in a loving marriage/partnership.
Quaich means 'cup' in Gaelic. It is a traditional Scottish two handled drinking cup, which can be used during a marriage or civil partnership ceremony to symbolise the joining together of the couple and their families and friends.
At their marriage in 1589, King James VI of Scotland presented a Quaich to Anne of Denmark. And more recently medallists at the Commonwealth Games in Glasgow (2014) were presented with a special wooden Quaich.
The following is an example of the words used during a recent ceremony involving a Quaich.
Other examples can be found on the internet, or you can write your own words. The registrar will be happy to discuss this with you when planning your ceremony.
After the couple have been declared married/civil partners:
Registrar, or a nominated guest, holds the Quaich up and says:
"The Quaich which I am holding, is a traditional drinking cup which is unique to Scotland. Drinking from a Quaich was part of a long established tradition of hospitality. If you shared a cup like this with somebody, you couldn't do harm or injury to the other; so you got the term 'loving cup'. King James VI (sixth) gifted this to his bride Anne of Denmark and thereafter sharing a Quaich became part of Scottish ceremonies. [name1] and [name2] would like to continue with this tradition today. As their first act together as a married couple, they are going to drink from this Quaich. In doing so they are symbolising their commitment to sharing everything in life and sealing the bond between them, whilst signifying the blending of their families."
Registrar fills the Quaich with whisky, wine or other preferred drink and says:
"Strike hands with me, the glasses brim,
The dew is on the heather.
For love is good and life is long,
And two are best together.
Bless the union of these two,
Eager for marriage, eager for love.
May they begin life together,
Live that life together
And come to the end together.
[name1] and [name2], it is now time to complete your bond."
Registrar steps forward and presents Quaich to [name1] and [name2], then to the wedding party.
Registrar: "The Quaich will now be passed between the families whilst [name1] and [name2] sign the schedule."
The following is an example of the words used during a recent ceremony that included a Rose Ceremony.
Other examples can be found on the internet, or you can write your own words. The registrar will be happy to discuss this with you when planning your ceremony.
In the Rose Ceremony, the couple give each other a red rose bud. Two red rose buds are all that is necessary. If you have children involved in the ceremony, you may have a rose for each of them too.
The Rose Ceremony is placed near the end of the ceremony just before the couple leave the room.
In the old language of flowers, a single red rose has always meant "I love you".
The Rose Ceremony gives recognition to the new status of the couple.
After the couple have been declared married/civil partners the registrar will say:
Your first gift to each other today has been your rings - which shall always be an outward demonstration of your vows of love, respect and commitment to each other.
In addition, you both have given and received one of the most valuable and precious gifts of life - one I hope you always remember - the gift of true and abiding love within marriage/civil partnership.
It is now my great privilege to be the first to address you as wife and husband/civil partners and for your first gift as wife and husband / civil partners, that gift will be a single red rose bud.
(Registrar hands each a red rose)
The rose is considered a symbol of love and a single rose always means only one thing - it means, "I love you." . So it is appropriate that for your first gift - as wife and husband/civil partners - that gift would be a single rose bud.
Please exchange the rose buds as your first gift to each other as wife and husband / civil partners.
Within these rose buds, if given proper loving care, is the potential for an even more beautiful expression of life and love in the form of the mature flower. And so it is with your marriage. At this point your marriage is like these rose buds - ready, with proper loving care - to unfold into a very beautiful expression of life.
[name1]and [name2], if there is anything you remember of this ceremony, let it be that it was love that brought you here today, it is only love which can make your relationship strong and enduring. Whatever the situation, love, understanding, acceptance and forgiveness can make everything right.
As the couple exits the ceremony they walk to each other's mother and present the rose buds. This is a nice way of involving the mothers in the ceremony.
If you choose not to tell the mothers you will be doing this, it can be a lovely surprise.
Be sure to tell the photographer that this will be happening - you will want to capture this special moment.